Pretty in Pink? Not so much.
It’s not that every generation doesn’t have crazy outfits and fashion trends, I know they do (Lady Gaga). But the 80’s decade was a fashion bomb. I should know, I was running around high school at the time, and everyone looked liked crap. The big thing about this though and this is key: No matter what shit we wore we all thought we were cool. We thought we were, but damn we were in denial, we sucked out loud, like a fashion train-wreck. I could blame Madonna, I could blame Wham but the truth is we’re all to blame. It’s time someone took a stand and called out the 80’s, it’s had a free pass for too long.
Everyone remembers the cool music, punk rock influences and individuality but I think people forget what compete idiots we looked like. Nobody ever said anything because we were all wearing the same shitty outfits. Pins on coats that were 5 sizes to big, 5 shirts at the same time, ALL with the fucking collar sticking up for some god damn reason. Vests, suspenders, neon sun glasses with neon shirts, you get the picture.
I could go on and on trust me but what’s the point. Lets just gaze through the slide show of the 80’s. Or as I like to call it, visual hell.
Before I get a slew of emails telling me about how bad people dressed in other decades let me run through the other decades to save you the time and embarrassment of me yelling at you publicly.
Everyone seemed happy, everyone wore suits or dresses.
Everyone was boring, NEXT.
Think of the 1960’s as a cross over from the 50’s and not quite as informal as the 70’s. Groovy baby! Where’s Austin Powers, I want his mojo?
Leather and denim and yes even more denim. Oh and lots of drugs
Easy Rider was released in 1969 but lets just say they were ahead of their time and ushered in the hippie generation
This picture sums it up. Clearly nothing was off limits. Are those four chicks?
Better than the 80’s but not much, look out for the Jamz.
Why are these assholes so happy?
Back to basics, stating to get our fashion shit together.
No, they didn’t all wear tuxedos all the time, but you get the point. This is also a thanks to all my female readers: My wife, Nor, Mirella, Gwen and others here you go Mr. George Clooney. Don’t say I never gave you ladies anything.
My final Argument against the 80’s: Vanilla Ice
Any decade that made this ‘idiot’ famous has lost all credibility with me.
Don’t get me wrong, I liked the 80’s, had a lot of fun growing up in the 80’s but nobody ever points out the bad stuff, that’s where i come in handy 😉 People everywhere always defend the 80’s and how great it was. Sure it was fun, it was cool and we discovered the pet rock and neon. Let’s not forget though we all dressed like a pile of shit and don’t get me started on the god damn hair.
YES, this is me… Yes, that is a pink bow tie. Yes, that is a pink belt. Yes that is a white sequined glove. Yes, In the 80’s I dressed like an idiot just like everyone else.
Thanks for coming over to Atomic Gator, your retro 80’s headquarters, or some shit like that.