Without further adieu: My 2011 Atomic Gator Christmas List. Attention all you Wal-Mart Shoppers, go fuck yourselves.
‘Jesus Shaves’ Mug
Christ, I forgot my mug!
Excited Snowman Sweater (size medium)
We all need stupid ass holiday sweaters to annoy relatives, this should do the trick
Preggers Virgin Mary Ornament
I’ve never seen the pregnant Mary, we need to see more of her. Maybe she can get her own show on MTV.
Margaret Thatcher Nutcracker
Mmmmm nuts. Wait are those nuts or did Maggie take a huge shit?
I can imagine this actor’s big break was being featured in this ad. His Agent: Well, I got you a gig but it does require you to sit on the shitter and fish. “I’ll do it! It’s the role I was born to play.” <—- Might have been his response
Mr Tea Mug
I pity the fool who touches my afternoon tea bag.
Seriously, these are real things?
Death Star Cookie Jar
My wife nagging: No more cookies, we had a deal! ME: I’ve altered the deal, pray I don’t alter it further. Nom, Nom, Nom… cookies
Bacon Flavored Toothpaste
Any explanation needed?
Steve Zissou Adidas Shoes (Size 10)
I would kill someone for a pair of these. Kill.
Gossip Girl compete series DVD box set
Never seen the show, I was just trying to think of the dumbest shit I would never want and I came across this.
Yard Aerator shoes
This will allow me to keep my yard healthy. Plus, I also have the option of drop kicking my neighbors while simultaneously decapitating them, which is nice especially during the holiday season. And really year round for that matter. Brought to you by the idiots at SkyMall.