I don’t have the attention span to write anything of great length but I’ll give you a few ramblings to help keep your Atomic Gator fix needs met.
Thanksgiving is the best holiday PERIOD. Any holiday that doesn’t require you buying gifts or stupid ass holiday cards is #1 in my book. Also, food….. You can eat an extraordinary amount of it. Do you need any other reasons? IF you said YES, don’t be a dick.
Stealing/Hijacking a beer truck, is there any downside? Seriously, in this economy the beer distributor would love ANY free publicity. Even if it’s from a helicopter camera shot flying over the freeway. You have a truck load of beer, loads of possibilities and the envy of EVERY PERSON in America.
I honestly can’t think of one downside to stealing a beer truck. In fact if done right, from that day forward you’ll always be known as ‘The guy or girl who stole the beer truck.’ And that my friends is a pretty fucking cool title to carry around with you the rest of your life.
Do you know that Christmas song about the stupid boy, his dead mother and buying shoes for Jesus? I hate that fucking song and will unload on ANYONE who likes it, makes me listen to it or even sort of likes it. Look kid I’m sorry your mom died but I’m not giving you these $350 pair of Jimmy Choo shoes. Maybe you have other things to worry about instead of buying shoes for a dead woman? Also, is Jesus that vain if you don’t show up with some nice shoes he sends you down the hatch, instead of up? What an asshole. Not me, Jesus, he’s the one who demands nice shoes. Take it up with him. Did I just call J an asshole?
What are my favorite Holiday movies? I’m glad you asked.
1. Bad Santa
3. Scrooge (Bill Murray is so awesome)
4. National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation
5. The Grinch who stole Christmas. The cartoon
6. A Christmas Story (over played but still enjoyable)
Have fun this holiday season. Drink too much at the office party and do some questionable things and make some bad decisions. It will be a lot more fun that way.