Back story: Had my annual eye exam at SEARS on July 15th. Mistake one, but what are you going to do in the Midwest suburbs. Ordered more contacts, they said, we’ll order them and have Vistakon ship them right to your house. Me: Great, I’m out. Fast forward to August 2nd, my eyes hurt, need to replace contacts but I have not received the new supply. Here’s where the main plot thickens.
Went to SEARS, stated my case. They looked into it, called Vistakon and they confirmed the US Dumb Ass Post Office delivered them on July 22nd at 11:22am. Really? Not only did they give you a date, but a time? My letter carriers wouldn’t know how to tell time unless they quite talking on their personal phone calls and looked at a digital display. Called my local post office to talk to the delivery supervision. Guess what, none available. We try this phone thing 3 more times till I decide to drag my two young kids down to the post office for what I tell my 5 year old is going to be a showdown and daddy’s going to have to put someone at the Post Office in “time out.” Her reply, “cool.”
Waited a little bit and went to the post office and low and behold, not one of the 3 delivery supervisors where around. How shocking right? Called Sears back, they say we can’t do anything the post office said they were delivered. I say, clearly they were not. She then tells me how to check my mailbox. No joke, she tells me they are in a small box, and it was delivered by the post office not UPS. Then she says I should check where my mail is “usually” delivered. First off, FUCK YOU. Secondly, I’m 42, I know how to check my own mailbox. Yes, I know the post office was supposed to deliver them, we went thru that already. But it was nice of her to let me know the contacts, which I’ve worn for twenty years come in a little box, here I was looking for something the size of a bulldozer. Oh, and apparently I wasn’t checking my mailbox correctly.
Finally talked to the delivery supervisor at the post office, that piece of shit was as helpful as I anticipated. Think DMV worker but dumber and possibly lazier, I said possibly. Yes, he confirmed that it was delivered on July 22nd to my house. No it wasn’t I reiterated and asked what the next step was for me. Well, it turns out there is no next step. I said excuse me? There is no other step? Nope, we delivered it July 22nd. NO YOU DIDN’T DIPSHIT, or at least not to MY house. So, then I asked him if you are saying it’s delivered then that just means it’s not on the truck, but not necessarily delivered to the correct address. Which he replied yes. Which means, they can deliver it to a trash can behind 7/11 and as long as it’s not on the truck anymore it’s marked DELIVERED. Wow, I wonder why the post office is about to go out of business.
My next step: Call Sears, who tell me to call Vistakon myself and explain the situation. I told her, that is your job, I paid you so you call them. She says she did and confirms they were delivered. Fine, give me the number. Oh, she can’t. I have to go look it up myself. Fine. Call the douchebags and after a few minutes they say they can’t talk to me, they only deal with doctor’s offices who order the product.
Called fucking Sears back with this latest information to which she replied, I’ll try and call them back later. TRANSLATION: Fuck you sir. It’s your problem, not ours.
Can you tell why I’m a bit frustrated?
In Summary: The US Post Office sucks and can go to hell and Sears and Vistakon are not far behind
Vistakon is sending a year’s supply of “samples” marked in yellow boxes directly to SEARS. They are the same contacts but are marked up so I don’t re-sell them. You know because I may be in the black market of finding people with the exact same eye ball measurements as me. Well, I’m getting my contacts so that’s all that matters. All I have to say to the Post Office, Sears and Vistakon is WHAT NOW BITCHES?