First Lindsay Lohan goes from only dating guys to all of a sudden switching teams to be girlfriends with Samantha Ronson. Big deal right, Lindsay is a train wreck? Well we find out this week that soon to be single Christina Aquilera has also been linked to Samantha Ronson. What the hell is going on here? Not only does Samantha Ronson get the some of the biggest celebrity girlfriends she also gets them to switch teams. All I can say is WOW, that is very impressive. She must have some kind of magic in that box of hers, I have no other way of explaining it. I mean look at her, she looks like a dude. A very stupid ass looking dude.
I do understand why Christina has called it quits on her marriage, get a load of exhibit A. Fat Jordan Bratman. Can we rename him ‘Fat Brat?’
Hey newsflash Jordan, not only are you married to one of the most talented singers in the music industry but she is also one of the hottest. Do you think you could put down that box of doughnuts and just workout with your hot wife? Seriously, look at her. Is this too much to ask of you?
This was your wife moron, enough with the little debbie snack cakes.
Back to the dude
I get it, she looks like a dude so that is what appeals to the ladies but not even a good looking guy, more like the ‘Screech’ from Saved by the Bell. I’m sure she’s nice, I’m sure she’s talented but hey, I just don’t get it. Am I jealous, I guess I am but more like dumbfounded. I guess it goes back to girls liking the bad boys. Samantha Ronson is a bad boy right? She dresses like shit, smokes and wears that stupid ass hat everywhere. Something is going on and it must be her secret box, because it sure the hell isn’t the looks.
Remember guys the next time you’re working out, showering or ironing that nice shirt before you go out, sometimes it just doesn’t matter. Why? Because sometimes girls would rather be with a lesbian that looks like a bag of shit. Not that I’m judging.
That is all for now kiddies, don’t eat all your Halloween candy, save some for ‘Fat Brat.’