42 comments on “Hey assholes with the family car stickers, stop it jerks.

  1. OMG, Rich. My husband and I were laughing so hard over this. You brought me to tears. Best post yet, I think!

    I’m proud to say I don’t have any of those stickers on my car. On a serious note, some of that family stuff seems like bad OpSec (operational security), especially the ones where the kids’ names are written below each figure, and the car has “Honor student at Blah School” on the bumper. Just sayin’…

    Thanks for the laughs!!

    • That’s great Gwen. I’m very happy to hear you loved it. You guys who read my stuff consistently are tough to keep laughing, since you know my style. Thanks a lot, for the nice reply. Glad you guys enjoyed it. The story turned out a lot better than I thought it would.

    • Yeah, I think the jesus and abortion ones will be it’s own blog post one day. Thanks for reading, now shut your whore mouth. (inside joke) for everyone else. :-)

  2. Wow that new Eminem song is sooooo good!!!

    You gotta admit though the puppy and kitty are cool on those stickers. I had to share this post with my mom. we roflmfao.

  3. Hey Rich, I came over here coutesy of Gwen … LOVE this post. I so agree. Why do people insist on putting their family on display for every Tom, Dick, and Harry to see? Geez.

  4. Kerry-Ann and I laughed so fucking hard at this blog. Great writing my friend.

    I have to say I would love the put the “ass family sticker on my car. That’s hilarious!

    Good on your for liking the Eminem track. I take all kinds of heat around here from my daughters friends for enjoying “cool” music. For some reason they think it’s just not right that I do.

    Cheers!

  5. I have never seen those stickers and I laughed when I read this. The ones I loathe and despise are the fools with the “baby on board” signs. I always drive safely and the fact you have a kid on board doesn’t change that. The fact that you think your kid matters more than any other driver or passenger in any vehicle on the roads tells me you are probably among the number of those folks who expect “special treatment” and who ought not to have reproduced andy little images of themselves. Get over it! Even slime molds breed.

    • I couldn’t help but reply to this comment. I had a decal made that says “Kids on board so get off of my ass!” And you know what…dumb ass drivers who like to ride peoples asses in shitty weather think twice when they read it. When you’re a parent, YES your kids matter more than anyone!

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  8. Best fu**ing read ever!!! loved it!!! THANK YOU. I see these stupid stickers everyday on cars and it just really is such a pathetic thing to do!!! This blog tops it off, :))

  9. haha.. obviously the person who wrote this article doesn’t have a loving family. might be a lonely miserable paycheck-to-paycheck boozing social too cool for school douche. :P

    • Obviously, you are one of those idiots with the family car stickers. By the way, I know you have a small brain and didn’t realize this but you don’t have to have stupid ass family stickers on your car to prove you have a loving family. Just passing along that nugget of information.
      ~The person who wrote the article.

  10. The “In Memory of” stickers are the tackiest of all. Grieving should be personal, and not to be displayed on a bumper sticker like it’s a fad. It denigrates the person who died and cheapens the grieving process. The argument is that it serves as a reminder, and it obviously does, so why not place the sticker inside the car on say… the dashboard for example. It only shows that the owner of the vehicle is a narcissist begging for attention. I drive for a living, and I have noticed an increase in these types of stickers. I am anxiously waiting for the goof versions to make their first appearances.

  11. People should be entiltled to put what ever they want on THEIR cars, so what if they have stickers, They are not rude or offensive oh and speaking of small Brains, The baby on Board is not foor driving safely, it is for when an accident occurs and the driver may be unconsious, If a baby seat gets thrown and the sticker is present, they know to look for a baby.. Get your facts right before slagginfg of caring Moms.

  12. Thanks for stopping by sally. I assume you have these stickers on your car. You are aware this is a comedy blog right? Not CNN? okay good. Maybe don’t come back if you can’t take the jokes..
    Sincerely, Administration.

  13. I ACTUALLY DONT HAVE THE STICKERS AND NOT A MOTHER, i AM AWARE, But if you can be rude to others, why cant u take some back???

  14. ROTFL!
    Is sallytigger2912 for real? The ‘Baby On Board’ is to help emergency responders look for a baby?? The only reason they would have to look for a baby would be if the child was ejected from the vehicle. If you buckled the car seat in properly, then the chances of that happening would be extremely slim. If you attach the seat properly, yet the child (and car seat) were still thrown from the vehicle, chances are it would be a ‘recover the body’ situation anyway.
    Automobiles are the leading cause of accidental death of children in North America. Perhaps those stickers should read, “Baby At Risk”…

  15. I think someone has family issues. Are you a bit jelous of the sticker people that are proud of their families? You have obviouly spent a lot of time studying and analyzing them to death. Perhaps you don’t have a family or even a car…

    • So, let me get this straight you come to my comedy blog and you want to analyze me? lol now, that’s funny. This is a comedy blog, if you don’t agree with the comedy then please don’t come back… but since you’re here lets get something straight. So, just going by your words, you think I perhaps don’t have a family nor a car because I don’t have family stickers on a car I drive? That is you hypothesis? Good work Sherlock Holmes, you’ve cracked the code..lol Good lord, you’re insane…

    • Sorry, but anyone even remotely normal knows that the stick families are weird and creepy. Aside from a couple of defensive responses here, I have never heard of anyone who would admit to even knowing someone who puts those things on their vehicles. Ant that is what’s so disturbing about it…what would possess you to do it? It’s not like you’re displaying an interest in sports or a past time. And it certainly isn’t cute or clever. I always think ‘stick figures for christ’ because the whole display reeks of self-righteous, judge-mental, holier-than-thou-ism.

  16. Sally, thank you for telling me what the “baby on board” sticker really means. It is clear that you are an idiot.

  17. Love when people read a blog that is obviously meant to be funny and get all high and mighty! I hate those stickers. I don’t feel the need to tell everybody I have kids – some of the time I am trying to forget!!!! Glad I found your blog – will come back to see what you have to make me laugh again.

  18. I love this post. Those stickers are really annoying! I especially love the Ass family – hilarious.
    I saw one car window the other day which included a picture of a child with wings and a halo. I felt first confused and then sad. Is this the favourite child who is a little angel, or has this child actually died in which case how awful!

    I have to take my hat off however to the person who came up with this idea. At $4.00 each, you are making a fortune off people’s misguided idea that other people care about their family. Congratulations, your super fund is looking very healthy!

  19. I actually came here after a Google search because I was thinking about putting some stickers on my car, but I wanted something different. This blog has given me inspiration for some really wacky ideas. Thanks for the laughs. Oh, and btw, I’ve seen a number of drivers who are absolutely scary weaving in and out of traffic almost causing accidents, and guess what … they have “baby on board” stickers!!!! Unbelievable. Next time I see one, I’m going to pull alongside and say “if you don’t care about your kids, why should the rest of us?”

    Anyway, I’m off to read your other posts… thanks!

  20. My husband detests these stickers so much a co-worker stuck them on his car this April Fools day- it was so funny to see his reaction as he thought our kids had done it – “get those ####en things off my car!” The kids thought it was hilarious!

  21. Too funny!! WAY too funny. I hurt now, from laughing so much. I saw a version of the Ass Family sticker here in Australia recently that had about 8 family members. Hilarious!!

    I just feel that the stick figure stickers are so lame, and some of them a tad creepy, but some of the “alternative” versions are so cool. And don’t get me started on those damn Frangipani stickers!!

    Off to read some more of your posts. Given the original for this is a couple of years old I think I have missed out on some serious laughter opportunities. LOL

  22. I happened to Google something like “those stupid SUV family stickers” & found this article. Thanks for the laughs! Although, I will admit I chuckled the other day when I saw a car with “zombie-fied” family stickers… don’t know if you ever saw those.

  23. Any judgmental a-hole can make stupid statements – don’t need a blog to prove it.

  24. Just ran across your blog. This is hilarious stuff! When I pull into the kids school I am surrounded by these stick figures. Clearly families in Canada have really taken to them. I wouldn’t want them myself but if I HAD to have a decal it would be like one of the dad’s in the parking lot..
    “Nobody cares about your stick figure family” and the figures are being chased by a chainsaw wielding masked man, LOL!

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